Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you’re having a lovely vacation. Because I’m not actually on vacation. Unless you consider drinking coconut coffee from the Keurig while I work in my office a vacation. Because I don’t. At any rate, I saved the US taxpayers nearly $4 million by not being First Lady and flying off for a 17-day vacation in Hawaii on the taxpayers dime. You can thank me later.
Michelle Obama, noted supporter of the 99% and champion of the poor, on the other hand, is reportedly draining taxpayer funds to finance a massive year-end festival of relaxation on the sunny shores of Oahu while the rest of us slave away so that we aren’t unemployed come her husband’s fourth year as President.
And don’t think she’s dressing like a regular tourist while she’s there, either, you peons. As she accompanied Barack and family to church services on the Kaneohe Bay Marine Base on Sunday, Michelle sported a Resort Collection Sophie Theallet sundress (thumbnail), which, at the time it was purchased in late 2009, cost between $1K and $2K. Similar dresses from the Resort 2012 collection sell for that much and more.
But fear not, oh children of the proletariat. Should you like to dress like the First Lady, but fear having to go on food stamps after wasting your entire unemployment check on a sundress, you can rent a Sophie Theallet dress from internet retailer Rent the Runway (you have to give it back), for around $125.
You might, however, be able to cash in your monthly allotment for her bargain basement skirt.
In this ubiquitous politician-phot0-with-a-baby-on-Christmas (ever more important considering that Barack can magically speak to babies), Michelle Obama is sporting a Comme des Garcons, 3/4 length printed skirt with a bag waist. This skirt is typical for CdG, and can retail anywhere for up to $1K, with similar items for sale at SSense – an internet designer outlet – for $450 (down from a peak of $950). Or, if you’re like me and can occasionally shop in the kids department because you were born without any shape whatsoever, you can snag a similar skirt from Comme des Garcons kids collection for $495 new. Unfortunately, since the skirts are limited edition and only available to busy and important people, you’ll have to pre-order yours for delivery in March.
It will however, look better on someone who isn’t drawing the waist of the skirt up to the bottom of their boobs. And frugal fashionistas can obviously thank Al Gore for saving us from global warming, thus allowing them to wear their extravagant purchase year round.
And, come to think of it, is making this “vacation” sort of like Hawaii.
P.S. HOLY SH*T ON A STICK! We got a Drudge link!!! And here we thought we could spend the whole freaking day in pajamas watching a Tudors marathon on the BBC…but noooooooo. We’re approving comments as they come in!