He should have stuck with talking to mannequins

Just when you thought things couldn’t possibly get worse for Rick Perry, they did.

In the past week, he called on a mannequin during an appearance at a diner, almost was left out of the South Carolina debates (it’s entirely possible they just felt sorry for him at this point and left him in), and barely polled ahead of Stephen Colbert in last week’s Public Policy Polling survey of South Carolina (a whopping seven percent to Colbert’s five). That’s right, a man not on the ballot, known for satirizing Republicans, is almost even with Rick Perry in a poll of REPUBLICAN voters.

So what’s a man to do?  Why, cause a diplomatic incident, of course!

“When you have a country that is being ruled by what many would perceive to be Islamic terrorists,” Perry said, “when you start seeing that type of activity against their own citizens, then yes, not only is it time for us to have a conversation about whether or not they belong to be in NATO, but it’s time for the United States, when we look at their foreign aid, to go to zero with it.”…..

In a scathing statement, Turkey’s ambassador to the United States expressed his disappointment and concern over Perry’s comments, calling them “misplaced” and “ill-advised.” The ambassador also said Turkey receives no significant foreign aid from the U.S.

“The Turkey described in the debate simply does not exist,” Ambassador Namik Tan said. “Turkey is a secular democracy that has for decades been an essential and trusted partner of the U.S. Our bilateral relations are based on the common values of democracy and respect for human rights, rule of law, and free-market economy.”

There are so many countries that fit that label better than Turkey in the Middle East, like, virtually all of the rest of them. Iran, Qatar, Yemen, and Saudi Arabia, just for starters, are far worse towards their citizens, towards us, and towards the world in general.  I mean, yeah, the Turks aren’t exactly stalwarts for human rights, but they’re downright liberal compared to the other named nations.

I think we’ve had enough international incidents in the last decade by virtue of Sean Penn’s travels alone, so Governor, please, get back to soliciting questions from inanimate objects.  Thanks.