Occupy Chicago to throw Occupy Festival, ignore irony

The Occupy Wall Street movement’s Google Doc of Fancy Ideas hasn’t been updated in months now, and the last time anyone heard about an Occupy movement in another city was solely because they busted up a Starbucks of threw a brick at a cop, not because their quest for income equality or a diametric change in societies rigid commitment to hygiene. But fear not. Occupy Chicago – my home Occupy movement that never quite developed into more than a coffee klatch in a public park – is furthering the cause by hosting an Occupy Music Festival just in time for all those hippies to travel here for the NATO summit.

But beware. It might be getting a little 1% for its own tastes.

Occupy Festival, a music and art fest to be held on Saturday and Sunday, May 12-13 in Chicago’s Union Park and is an event which will kick off the Chicago festival season in grand style. This two-day green event, permitted by the City of Chicago and Chicago Park District features two stages where organizers expect more than 25 top international, national and local musicians to perform. It will also feature a third area set aside for special musical guests and visual performing artists who stop by to show their support and share their passion in a more intimate setting with event attendees.

The lineup has yet to be announced, by as organizers told the A.V. Club, all of the acts will endeavor “highlight the struggle of social and economic inequality through artistic performance.” This could mean that attendees are in for two afternoons of whiny ballads by Third Eye Blind, or it could mean that most of the acts will blissfully ignore that they are playing on instruments crafted for profit by international corporations in a park completely funded on the backs of a wealthy taxpaying elite.

The bad news for Occupy Movement old-timers, though, is that attending the festival isn’t free. Tickets for the event are $35 for one day and $55 for two days (which is only slightly less than the suddenly-seeming-mainstream Pitchfork Festival) – distinctly 1% prices. There was a VIP package option featuring exclusive gourmet food offerings, though that has since been “discontinued” in favor of true equality.

That said, 50% of the ticket price goes to support Occupy Chicago. The other 50%, well, no one knows for sure. What we do know for sure is that it will be collected by SolidClarity LLC, a registered Illinois corporation. Yes, that’s right, it seems that the Occupy movement has registered a corporation, fully and ironically taking advantage of the protections offered by corporate personhood.

We laugh, but we’re really going to miss them when they’re gone, or they go to grad school or they form their own subcultural civilization and then get wiped out by long-eradicated diseases like the sweating sickness. We’ll miss them.

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  1. the pygmy rattler

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