Joe Biden supports your sexytime.

They let this man be Vice President. Remember that. Next time you’re looking for your cell phone while you’re talking on your cell phone or you can’t find your glasses or you have a peanut butter and pickle sandwich because there’s nothing left in the fridge, or you get lost in the grocery store, or you walk into a wall in public.

Remember, this man is just a heartbeat away from leading the world’s only remaining superpower.


“You know there’s and old Irish saying,” Biden said. “There’s all kinds of old Irish sayings. (Laughter.) At least my Grandfather Finnegan, I think he made them up, but it says, may the hinges of our friendship never go rusty.  Well, with these two folks that you’re about to meet, if you haven’t already, there’s no doubt about them staying oiled and lubricated here. Ladies and gentlemen — (laughter) — now, for you who are not full Irish in this room, lubricating has a different meaning for us all.”

To be fair, he could be referring to the occasional use of “lubricated” to mean drunk off your ass. In which case he’s making a racist assumption about the Irish. But more likely, he’s talking about KY Jelly. Because that’s clearly the assumption here. Because now you’re thinking about Joe Biden and KY Jelly in the same context and its gonna take a week for you to forget about it.

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