Hippies celebrate Earth day by trashing San Francisco public park.

There’s a saying that every hippie conclave eventually ends up in two things: grilled cheese and Hepatitis. Actually, that’s not a saying. I just made it up. Because I can. This is my blog. Get your own f***ing blog if you don’t like it.

Okay, at any rate, if the Occupy rallies and their ensuing host of communicable diseases are any indication, hippies, like certain math problems, left to their own devices over a period of time will produce an expected result. You would think that Earth Day would be an exception. After all, they’re celebrating the Earth in an effort to bring awareness to the slow degeneration of the environment resulting from the careless actions of the human race. So…yeah. Right.

Is that a f***ing coffee table? In a f***ing park? How did that even happen? What could these celebrations even possibly entail that would require a coffee table be relocated to the middle of the public park? When did hippies stop celebrating basically everything by smoking a doobie and laying on a tie-dye blanket guessing cloud shapes? WHY DOES THIS NEW WORLD TERRIFY ME?

In addition to spreading their sh*t everywhere, San Francisco’s Marina District Earth Day revelers ran local grocery stores out of domestic beer, so your assumptions about liquor consumption by people in wealthy liberal areas is probably wrong.

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