Wait, no. That’s not it. It is actually more fun to stand over them laughing. Why have I been avoiding this issue? Is it because, not being 1/32 Cherokee or possessing the high-cheekbones common to Native Americans, I couldn’t sympathize with the need to exploit university “diversity” hiring programs for my own benefit? Is it because I simply have no way of understanding the horrors that Elizbeth Warren’s ancestors endured at the hands of…er…her ancestors?
Perhaps I just haven’t been exposed to the unique culinary heritage that accompanies such a profound legacy. Thank goodness Elizabeth Warren is there to help.
Warren, who has been under fire for claiming Indian lineage despite a lack of documentation, is identified as “Elizabeth Warren, Cherokee” under each of five recipes she contributes in the cookbook, published in 1984 by the Five Civilized Tribes Museum located in Muskogee. Warren is not listed as an official member of the Cherokee tribe and she has been unable thus far to document her claim of any Native American heritage.
She offered a recipe on herbed tomatoes, touting them as a “great accompaniment to a plain meat and potatoes meal!” She also included a crab with tomato mayonnaise dressing dish and a Mexican oatmeal soup that included oats, onions, tomatoes and chicken broth…
To quote Jonah Goldberg, nothing says “Oklahoma Cherokee” like crab and mayonnaise. Or, for that matter the Cherokee recipes that call for that traditional Native American ingredient, Velveeta. Or bologna. And I’m not really sure how Oriental Beef Stir Fry upholds the proud tradition of the peoples who lived off the land in America.
But Ms. Warren is, of course, only 1/32 Native American, so if the recipes in the book are also 1/32 Native American, it goes without saying that she’s only following the directives of her ancestry. Diversity, people. Or maybe history is all wrong and when the American pioneers encountered tribes hostile at having their ancestral lands usurped by white people with no claim and no idea what they were doing, they were really just mad because the settlers weren’t available for brunch.
Also, Cherokees don’t have Pow-Wows according to Cherokees. But white people relying on outdated stereotypes about Native American culture while simultaneously trying to exploit it to win points in an Ivy League hiring process has absolutely no metaphorical connection to the historical treatment of native peoples. At least when progressives do it.