Over the weekend, Snoop Dogg (who, the media conveniently forgot had changed his name to Snoop Lion when he discovered that he was the reincarnation of Bob Marley, even though Bob Marley died in 1981, and Snoop was actually born ten years before that) posted a list of ten reasons why he would vote for Barack Obama over Mitt Romney.
Turns out, Snoop likes big butts and he cannot lie.
Look, I think a lot of things about Barack Obama, but one thing I don’t think about him is that he could take anyone who isn’t a middle-schooler in a fight. And even then, it would have to be an unarmed middle-schooler. Who hasn’t made puberty yet. And who is suffering from some sort of vitamin deficiency that keeps him skinny. And even then, Barack Obama would still have to have a head start and the option to tag out to Michelle.
And technically Mitt Romney’s name is Willard. Which isn’t an improvement, but still.