Ever wonder what happens to that information you give political organization? Sure, some of them waste their money sending you those crazy letters with all the capitals and red font designed to scare old people into giving them cash, but otherwise, what’s the point of hanging on to all those names and addresses?
1. The Democrats have found a way to be self-sustaining and circumvent the privacy of their donors: sell that information to corporations so that they can sell you things you don’t want.
2. A gentleman in Oakland, CA (where else!) has written a book that he thinks will inspire the next generation of Occupy Wall Street. Which is fine, since at this age, they’re impressionable and adverse to bathing anyway.
3. The post office will no longer be delivering you junk mail on Saturday.
4. Obama sent a personal video to NARAL’s annual pro-choice dinner, honoringRoe v. Wade and a chick who claimed Mitt Romney wanted to throw women into bodies of water to drown.
5. Our interference seems to have dramatically improved the plight of democracy and reason in Egypt. Just kidding. They think ladies’ boobies cause digestive problems now.
It’s a new day, America. And we’re getting a new look. Everything’s coming up Milhouse.