Morning Report: The Digital Fifty.

35213869Okay, okay. So this happened yesterday, but apparently, I am some sort of digital genius, at least according to Business Insider, partly because of this blog and partly because of the Hey Girl, It’s Paul Ryan thing, and partly because, in real life, I run an awesome little company that tries its darnedest to make conservatives and libertarians just a teensy bit cooler.

It’s an honor – a big one – and especially so because (1) I seem to be the only one-man, working-class digital operations shop on the list and (2) NakedDC is a labor of love that I consider hanging up on once a week. But, like a gay, sheep-herding Colorado cowboy, you know I can’t quit you. I love you. And you like me. You really really like me. *sob*

Okay, enough mushy stuff. Back to work.

1. We’re all sort of confused about the sequester. First, it’s a spending cut. Then its a spending increase. Then it’s Obama’s fault. Then its the GOP’s fault. Then, it’s the fault of a magical plant that talks only to Joe Biden. Thankfully, someone has put the whole story into Seuss format so as to help educate the masses, and – agree with it or not – it’s amazing.

2. It used to be that “99%” referred to all the Americans who weren’t super rich. But now, thanks to Steny Hoyer, it refers to all of the Americans who should be taxed more than they are already.

3. Michael Bloomberg would like you to please leave Barack Obama alone. Okay? Okay? LEAVE HIM ALONE. *sob*

4. Thanks to a law that went into effect secretly a few weeks ago, you may now be subject to a $500,000 fine and time in jail for “jailbreaking” your smartphone. That is more than Jesse Jackson, Jr. will get for stealing $750,000 from his campaign donors to buy Michael Jackson hats and a fur cape.

5. If only Jon Huntsman had been this articulate in the primaries.

Happy Friday, America!

P.S. If you are looking to make your voice heard on the subject of gun rights, there will be rallies across the country tomorrow. You can find out more information on your nearest rally here.

  1. Ike

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