Alleged racist Paula Deen gave lots of help to Barack Obama

24896049I’ve been busy contemplating the ramifications of naming my child after a compass direction and have not been giving adequate attention to the Paula Deen situation, wherein everyone’s favorite butter-loving television chef was alleged to routinely used racially-charged language to refer to minorities. Needless to say, everyone hates Paula Deen now and the Food Network won’t be renewing her contract and that one time I met her and she fed me butter fried in butter (not a joke) is no longer a good story to tell at parties unless I want people to think I sympathized with the wrong side in the Civil War.

I don’t. For the record. But she did feed me fried butter. Ask me if you see me.

Anyway, Paula Deen is a horrible racist who has never had a progressive thought in her life because who would ever use that term to refer to a minority in this day and age? Why, she must be one of those Republican, church-going, hatred-supporting vote suppressors we’re always hearing about! Which would probably be accurate if she didn’t happen to be close personal friends with the Obamas.

The Food Network star campaigned for Obama back in 2008, and invited his wife Michelle to cook with her during an episode of Paula’s Party. Later, she said she “just loved” being around the First Lady, and praised her platform: encouraging kids and young adults to eat healthy and get plenty of exercise.

Apparently, she used the racial slur as a term of endearment and her boundless liberal affection. Or something. Which definitely explains why she’s being sued by her former employee for $1.2 million for subjecting her to such suggestions as hiring a bunch of black children to dress up in little tuxedos for her son’s wedding (allegedly, though she has apologized now, so those allegations are likely confirmed) and openly viewing pornography in her restaurant office, which definitely doesn’t seem very Paula Deen-y. Not as nice as you would think, it seems.

Of course, she may have soured on the Obamas, too, in later days. Just over a year ago, Deen and Michelle Obama released competing cookbooks, Deen’s about southern home cooking and Michelle Obama’s about eating healthy. Deen reportedly told a the Washington Examiner that Michelle packed away the food when the cameras stopped rolling, which left the White House incensed.

Deen even recently told the Washington Examiner, “[Michelle Obama] probably ate more than any other guest I ever had on the show! She kept eating even dur­ing commercials. Know what [the Obamas’] favorite foods are? Hot wings.”

She paints a picture of Obama that’s a far cry from the first lady who was photographed holding a worm she pulled from a vegetable garden yesterday.

According to the Enquirer, Obama now regrets going on Deen’s show. “Michelle’s spitting mad,” a source told the paper. “She thinks Paula is trying to smear her and her family just as the 2012 presidential election race swings into gear.”

Her slow-cooker pot roast recipe kicks ass. But I’m going to feel really guilty eating it now. Yeesh. And I have a feeling someone in the White House is checking Open Secrets right about now to figure out which campaign checks they need to send back.

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