The Republican party might think it has a problem in New Jersey governor Chris Christie, who routinely flouts their friendship and, instead, opening embraces traditionally liberal characteristics, like listening to Bruce Springsteen non-ironically, hugging the President and, of course, insisting on living in New Jersey. But if the GOP thought that they were somehow Chris Christie’s biggest beef, well, they’re at least one behind the pint-sized guido star of Jersey Shore.

They met today on the boardwalk at Seaside Heights and things were…awkward.

Gov. Chris Christie hates Snooki more than Snooki hates sobriety … so says the MTV star … and it couldn’t have been more apparent during an awkward encounter in NJ moments ago. Christie and Snooki came face-to-face on the Seaside Heights boardwalk after taping separate segments for the “Today” show.

During the exchange, Snooki complains that Christie is standing too close to her … so Christie comically leans in even closer. After Christie extended a handshake to the “Jersey Shore” star — who was flanked by JWoww and Deena Cortese –  Snook tells CC, “I just wanted to meet you, and just, hope you start to like us.”

To be fair, that’s probably a mark in his favor more than a mark against it.

As if Anthony Weiner didn’t have enough trouble on his hands – or in his hands – according to the photo on his website, he’s apparently actually running for mayor of Pittsburgh.

In his defense, that looks nothing like any bridge in NYC.

Isn’t everyone. It’s Friday and there’s a three day weekend looming large.

1. Barack  Obama is tired of fighting terrorism. But, isn’t everyone? Except, you know, the terrorists?

2. Back in 2008, the Obama campaign demanded an IRS investigation into a conservative group that connected Obama donor Bill Ayers to the Weather Underground. Which is…yeah, not really all that shocking.

3. Yesterday’s speech, while providing hours worth of self-pleasuring entertainment for MSNBC was a little light on Executive Branch responsibility. Or really on the Executive Branch in general.

4. Chris Christie is just trolling Republicans now. And it’s more than a little awesome.

5. Lois Lerner, like Eric Holder, signs a lot of things she doesn’t look at. Or something.

So close to the weekend, people, I can smell it.

Also, we are incredibly close to launching the new site. Like, REALLY REALLY close. So we have two questions for you: would you subscribe to a daily email newsletter that we send around provided it was funny? And two, would you buy NakedDC merch? Let us know.

This afternoon, Barack Obama gave a rousing speech to a roomful of people who apparently hadn’t heard him make it on the 2008 campaign trail. To run it down quickly, Barack Obama totes killed Osama bin Laden, America is definitely against terrorism but we can’t officially call it a war on terrorism because that means something else or whatever, Barack Obama has personally asked people to close Guantanamo Bay except that his administration closed the office in charge of closing Guantanamo Bay six months ago and drones are awesome – possibly not legal, but definitely effective which is, like, almost the same as legal.

Oh, and Eric Holder will be investigating Eric Holder for investigating journalists potentially investigating Eric Holder.

In a speech Thursday at National Defense University, President Barack Obama announced that he will convene a group of media organizations to work with Attorney General Eric Holder to go over the Justice Department’s guidelines on leak investigations following more than a week of scrutiny over his administration’s surveillance of reporters.

Obama said Holder and the media organizations will report back to him with their findings on July 12.

Why do I say Eric Holder will be investigating Eric Holder? Because appointing Eric Holder assumes Eric Holder had nothing to do with signing search warrants or issuing subpoenas on reporters who were seeking information on pertinent foreign relations stories. Eric Holder has, himself, insisted that he has had no part in harassing journalists getting a wee bit too close to the details of the administration’s foreign policy entanglements, though he doesn’t remember exactly what he signed when, and if it was about journalists, he totally recused himself, even though he didn’t do so in writing.

Except that, if that’s true, someone’s been doing an awfully good job of forging a signature for Eric Holder.

Attorney General Eric Holder signed off on a controversial search warrant that identified Fox News reporter James Rosen as a “possible co-conspirator” in violations of the Espionage Act and authorized seizure of his private emails, a law enforcement official told NBC News on Thursday.

The disclosure of the attorney general’s role came as President Barack Obama, in a major speech on his counterterrorism policy, said Holder had agreed to review Justice Department guidelines governing investigations that involve journalists.

Well, sh*t. That places a kink in things.

Technically, we already knew this, since subpoenas of that sort of classified nature would have required the DOJ head’s signature, and it would have been hard to to get that from someone other than Eric Holder. NBC News, it seems, is treating this like a breakthrough because Obama seems so completely wedded to the idea of Eric Holder finishing out his term at the DOJ, even as ardent defenders like the New York Times are ready to see Holder’s head on a platter. Instead, the administration, for whatever bizarre reason, puts the man on a special task force, seemingly to figure out how to sustain press freedom in an complicated environment, but really just to figure out how to hide it better next time. Or something.

This has turned into a bizarre experience. But at least they’re closing GitMo! Maybe. Probably not. Yeah, you win.

Because, well, obviously.

Lois Lerner, the director of the tax-exempt organizations division at the Internal Revenue Service, has been placed on administrative leave, sources in Congress and the administration confirm.

Federal workers are given pay and benefits when put on administrative leave.

“My understanding is the new acting IRS commissioner asked for Ms. Lerner’s resignation, and she refused to resign,” Sen. Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa) said in a statement. “The IRS owes it to taxpayers to resolve her situation quickly.”

So yesterday, when I said that Lois was being pressured to resign by lefty bloggers who’d met with the President but I guessed that she would likely refuse to be the fall guy for the entire IRS paperwork processing nightmare, I was right? Damn. Ten years in this business and you’re surprised every day.

Now it’s up to Darrel Issa to convince her to turn state’s witness. Unfortunately, Darrel Issa lacks the sexiness needed to effectively turn someone with just his charms and his six pack, so hopefully (for Darrel) Lois is familiar with the punishments that come with perjury.

Do you want real news today? Good. Because there isn’t any. The President gave a speech where he claimed to want to close Guantanamo Bay, but we all know he said that like five years ago and a bunch of enemy combatants are still getting a suntan in Cuba. Apparently, we’re all supposed to want them to be tried and detained on America soil, but other than Barack Obama, basically no one thinks that’s a good idea. Unless you happen to be a prisoner with whose just itching to shank an international criminal conspirator in the lunch line.

So, let’s watch Ted Cruz stick it to John McCain for the second day straight. Because who doesn’t love watching John McCain get all hot and bothered under that pancake makeup? Granted, Cruz could probably accomplish the same thing by stealing McCain’s afghan and running around threatening to wrap it around his hips why he danced to that pesky rock and roll all the kids are listening to now, but hey. Creativity.

So, yesterday. Ted Cruz just doesn’t trust those sneaky Republicans who are always making friends with Democrats and trying to bomb random middle Eastern nations.

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) on Wednesday defended his objection to initiating House-Senate budget negotiations unless Democrats take a debt limit increase off the table, saying he doesn’t trust his party to hold the line.

“The senior senator from Arizona urged this body to trust the Republicans. Let me be clear, I don’t trust the Republicans,” Cruz said. “And I don’t trust the Democrats.”

On Tuesday, Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) scolded Republicans for blocking negotiations. He was backed by Sen. Susan Collins (R-ME).

“Unfortunately,” Cruz said, “one of the reasons we got into this mess is because a lot of Republicans were complicit in this spending spree and that’s why so many Americans are disgusted with both sides of this house. … And every Republican who stands against holding the line here is really saying, let’s give the Democrats a blank check to borrow any money they want with no reforms, no leadership to fix the problem.”

Burn. And, today, post McCain’s meltdown.

Freshman Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas, suggested to Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., that he no longer represents the majority of Senate Republicans on the issue of increasing the debt ceiling — and he offered a bet to prove it.

“There may be more ‘wacko birds’ in the Senate than is suspected,” Cruz said on the Senate floor, recalling the name that McCain once applied to Cruz and Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., after their talking filibuster against President Obama’s drone policy.

This is about as terrifyingly brutal as Congress gets when fisticuffs are off the table. Sure, Cruz could use a few language lessons and perhaps a full time comedy writer, especially since John McCain is about as easy a target as they come, but let’s pause for a moment and just appreciate what little we have. Things are moving in the right direction here. All we need is a few casually placed references to things like possibly being the man who invented fire, possibly being around to establish the first judiciary, writing the first versions of Roberts Rules of Order on a cave wall in France, or missing the designated Senate naptime once too often, and we’ll be all set.

Anthony Weiner is exactly 26 hours into his campaign for New York City mayor and he’s already lost the support of New York governor Andrew Cuomo, who basically said that the world would be better off if Weiner slithered back under the rock he’s been living under for the past year, and had to haul out the public relations to team to seed the ground for an affirmative defense to a host of forthcoming, as-yet-unseen penis photos.

Because if there’s anything America really needs right now, it’s a brand, spanking new set of photos depicting Anthony Weiner’s junk.

Also, apparently, despite his difficulty in grasping the Twitter Direct Message function, he’s pretty savvy with sending hot photos of himself over email. Call it the generation gap.

“It is what it is,” Weiner said. “People may decide they want to come forward and say, here’s another email that I got or another photo. I’m certainly not going to do that. So people may hear things that are true, they may hear things that are not true, but I’m going to try to keep being focused on issues that are important to New York City.”

Weiner acknowledged that his campaign will include “a lot of apologizing,” but says he hopes people will first give him a chance to make his case and then think about voting for him.

Apparently, aside from visual aids, Weiner carried on what he considers “inappropriate conversations” over technology, which I assume means he was sexting like a high-schooler who can pay his own phone bill. Which is great, but begs the question: exactly what are Anthony Weiner’s qualifications for office aside from once having been involved in a classic DC sexytime scandal? I mean, it’s clearly all he’s known for, and besides apologies, his speeches have included little information on how he plans to run the city, other than perhaps relying on an outgrowth of the pure and un-abiding love he continually professes for the people of New York.

I’m not rich by any stretch, but I do have the luxury of not worrying about things like whether I am one day going to have to eat my cat, or whether I can afford to buy a tribal print jumpsuit from Forever 21 on a whim because I am completely obsessed with it and can’t live without it, even though it will be virtually impossible to pee without getting completely nude.

Anywhoo, despite those abilities, the only time I’ve ever been surprised by the sudden appearance of money is when I’ve found a twenty in a coat pocket that I somehow failed to use to purchase alcohol the last time I wore the coat. Penny Pritzker, Chicago billionaire and potential Commerce Secretary, on the other hand, is so rich, she can afford to forget she made around $80 million in income as a private consultant, and subsequently fail to report it on her mandatory disclosure forms.

No biggie.

Chicago billionaire Penny Pritzker inadvertently understated a portion of her income by at least $80 million in a disclosure form required for her nomination to be U.S. Commerce secretary and has amended the document.

Forms released online last night by the Office of Government Ethics show that Pritzker earned additional income for consulting work on hundreds of trusts, including family trusts, beyond what she disclosed last week. The omission, discovered by Pritzker’s financial advisers, was due to a clerical error, said Susan Anderson, the nominee’s spokeswoman.

“It is a substantial amount and we moved to correct the mistake as soon as it was discovered,” Anderson said in an e-mailed statement.

Pritzker is, as most of you well know, sort of like the Paris Hilton of Commerce Secretary nominees in the sense that her wealth isn’t derived from anything she did personally, but rather from her family’s founding of a successful chain of hotels, though she does own Pritzker Realty Group. The point is, as her lawyer put it, that she has a “fair amount of wealth,” which apparently makes filling out disclosure documents relatively difficult, because some of that wealth is held in the Bahamas and some of it is in the bottom of her purse and then there was a few million she found lying around in that bottom drawer of the oven, which she forces her handmaid to use in the winter to warm her sweaters.

Hahaha…no she doesn’t. That’s what poor people do. She has her sweaters hand warmed by a small Indonesian child. Probably. I don’t really know. But I find it strange that anyone can lose $80 million without actively sponsoring the upward mobility of the third world.

I don’t know what is more amazing about this prom photo: the incredible hair, the white jacket or the terrified, uncomfortable looks on the girls’ faces as they proudly display their semi-formal polyester wrap dresses.

The 1970s were such a simple time.

Kelli Alman, who the pictures are credited to, was Obama’s best friend Greg’s prom date. He’s wearing the white pants that appear to have gone with Obama’s white suit jacket. Obama’s prom date is Meghan Hughes, a student at a nearby school for girls where she had yet to learn the finer points of bra mechanics. And except for the slightly more lustrous hair, Barack Obama appears to have aged about three days since he was 18.

You can see the rest of the photos, including the short American novel “Barry” penned in Kelli’s yearbook over at Time. Bonus points for the future President for using the word “foxy.”

It’s cold again in Chicago. Winter is coming. And it’s not even June.

1. After spending weeks parading undocumented immigrant same-sex couples around the Capitol and crying about the plight of LGBT families where one member is facing deportation, Democrats dropped the provision to protect such couples out of the immigration bill like a hot potato.  Apparently, Sens. Dianne Feinstein, Dick Durbin, Chuck Schumer and Al Franken all have limits to their support of gay marriage.

2. Team Obama is attempting to use Justin Bieber to explain why they treated journalists like common criminals.

3. Darrel Issa is not interested in your invocation of the Fifth Amendment, particularly since you answered the charges before invoking it.

4. Apparently, when it comes to controlling our debt, which is skyrocketing out of control, we are “overachieving.” Someone gave Jack Lew a few too many participation trophies in grammar school.

5. Ted Cruz doesn’t trust Republicans. We welcome you to our little club, Mr. Cruz.

So close, America. So close.

P.S. Friends of the blog are holding a fundraiser for Oklahoma. Donations go to Mercury One and are 100% tax deductible.